Welcome to my 31 Days Writing Challenge! Day 30! I cannot believe how quickly this month and writing challenge has gone. I won’t lie, it has been hard at times and I’ve stayed up way to late, but I’ve also met some wonderful, faith filled bloggers. Let’s continue considering a good wife from the book of Sirach. We’ve talked about an intelligent wife, a modest wife, a good wife in a well ordered home and a good wife honors her husband. Today, “A Good Wife Makes Her Husband Happy.”
A Good Wife Makes Her Husband Happy
You know where I’m headed with this paragraph right? Yes, straight to my trusty Thesaurus. Here are some interesting synonyms I found for happy: peaceful, pleasant, blessed, looking good. Can I just say, a happy man is a good-looking man. A lot of times I will notice a man’s good looks because he has a nice smile or lively eyes.
A good wife allows her husband to be peaceful. There is nothing more appealing in this crazy world, than peace or someone who possess peace. I’m not saying they are in some zoned out place kind of peace. I am saying a person that does not enter the room carrying a bag of drama over their shoulder. Or how about a brave person–one who does not sidle up next to you ready to spill everything they think they know and lots of things they don’t. The husband of a good wife does not walk around with a chip on his shoulder, ready for the next fight, because that’s all he gets at home. He possesses a peace that allows him and those around him to just be and enjoy being.
There are some men who are completely different men when their wives are not around. They are jovial, thoughtful, encouraging, and entertaining. And then the wife walks in and you don’t have to know a thing about them to feel and see the tension. He immediately slumps, quiets and his eyes lower. He mumbles, stumbles and basically looks the fool she makes him out to be or tells him he is.
Wives, please, do not belittle your men. If you would not want that tone or those words directed at you, do not use them on your husband. It may make him look bad…but it makes you look worse. Whatever bad you say about your husband, reveals so much more about you than it does about him. It backfires. Maybe not in the moment; maybe in the moment people laugh but at some point later on it won’t be so funny.
In the middle of this post I sat down with my girls and watched a few minutes of Jeopardy, something I have not done in a long time–watch television. The commercials were insulting. Men are depicted are complete morons. Really? If you are unhappily married, please ask yourself–but ask first for the grace to see…is it because you have beat your husband down to a cowering fool? Well then, of course you’re unhappy. Who wants to be married to a coward who lets their wife beat them up spiritually, physically, emotionally and mentally? Did I just hurt your feeling? Were my words too harsh? I’m sorry. They are not meant to hurt but only help…but how much harsher are you to your man?
Too often women push, shove, kick and scream to get their way and they are still unhappy because her husband wasn’t man enough to say no. And before you tell me I have no idea what I’m talking about…try me. I sure do, only my husband wouldn’t put up with my bullying. He stood his ground and instead of making him unhappy, I had to make myself happy. Did you get that? I only tried to bully and hurt him because I was hurt. I guess you could say I was a mean girl. But he loved me and himself to much to allow me to get my way by being mean and ugly to him. Thanks be to God my husband stood his ground. It forced me to grow up and spiritually mature. It taught me to love my God, myself and my husband.
Please, take a look, a real hard, honest look at your husband. The world would like nothing better than to beat him down. Are you just one more of the worlds tools meant to beat, abuse, and demean your husband? You are worth so much more than to be an instrument of destruction to someone you love…or once loved…loved enough to marry. Regardless of what your husband is like, have enough self respect to stop being a mean girl.
If you are hurting so much all you can do is hurt the safest person next to you–the one who won’t fight back or leave, please get some help–grab your Bible, find a counselor, look for a woman who will mentor you as a woman…as a wife. But do something other than hurt someone else in an attempt to relieve your own pain.
And if you have children..stop it yesterday! Do not pass on your hurt to your children by making their father a fool in their eyes. Not only does that hurt your man–their father; it hurts your children. You don’t want your children to think they came from an idiot do you? I mean really, that’s what happens, they may join you in making fun of their dad, but it also makes them question who they are. That’s bullying your man when you turn the house against him and bullying your kids when you make them question who they are. You would not allow one of your children to be bullied at school, do not be lead bully at home...even if you end the bullying with a big fat “JK.” There is no kidding in this.